I pushed hard on the door to the coffee shop, it didn’t budge, probably because it was cardboard. The lady sitting on the bench: cardboard. The bench: cardboard. “These are all props!” I yelled to my husband, replacing his smile with a look of disgust.

We were on a couple’s retreat meant to produce a stronger marriage. The last year wreaked havoc on our relationship. We were both made to work from home.

“Thomas, you have to climb that pole and hit the white circle with a red line through it!” I couldn’t remember the proper name of that thing, but it was surely out of place. This had to be the last step in getting us to the finish line.

I pointed upwards with a hard thrust of the arm. “Goooo!” He shook his head and began his journey. I laughed to myself, he looked like a frog with his legs bent outwards moving one leg at a time. When he finally reached the top, he asked me was I sure. “Never been so sure about anything in my life.” He slammed his hand on the sign immediately after my approval.

The squealing sound of metal being pulled apart brought me to my knees. Thomas fell to the ground and just laid there. Once he realized he was okay, he lifted himself up onto his elbows and we watched as the top of the room opened. An alarm sounded then bright red delicious looking apples began to fall from the ceiling. We both covered our heads for protection. There was no where to hide from the abundance of fruit. We stood up and looked around for the way out, there seemingly wasn’t one.

“Testing, Testing.” We heard a tapping noise followed by the echo of someone’s voice.

“This is your instructor. Please note, the biggest mistake of all time was a man once listening to his wife. Please work together to complete the course. You must start again at the beginning. Go back the way you entered. A team member will instruct you from there.”

How on Earth would we survive this?

Johnny ran smack dab into me as he investigated the sky. I turned, grabbed him by the arm and scolded him. “Watch where you’re going son!” “Mom, he’s only three. You don’t have to be so harsh.” My eldest daughter, who was now in her teens, felt it her duty to give me directions.

“I am in charge with your Daddy gone.” I told her. She scooped Junior up and followed me towards the fence that outlined the treacherous waters.“Hurry up!” They were so slow. Sissy was thirteen, Sherry was nine and Sara was eight. Junior was a surprise that I could have done without.

I rummaged through my purse as we stood at the gate with the rest of the spectators. No binoculars, we weren’t going to be able to see a thing. “I wish you girls were helpful!” They were lazy and good for nothing. I was nervous most of the time without Big John and medication didn’t help.

“I have an idea.” I pushed back and forth on the wooden part of the railing. It seemed sturdy.“Climb over!” I told them. They whined in disapproval but fearing repercussion, did as I said. We walked through the grassy area and carefully stepped down each giant stone. The waves crashing against the shoreline took my focus until I heard the roar of the Rocket’s engine. “Kids, Daddy’s home!” I pointed to the Contender as it entered back into the Earth’s atmosphere. Big John named the spacecraft himself.

“Ma’am, you can’t be over there!” Security raced our way when they realized our position, clearly not knowing who we were. “Hold hands.” We moved quickly; I felt my foot slip. “Sissy!” I screamed as I fell, hitting my head on a rock. I rolled into the water; face down, unable to move, I gurgled trying to get air I could barely make out my littlest girl’s voice as I drifted out of consciousness. “I told you she would do something stupid if we hid the binoculars.” They wanted me dead.

I reminded the girls; I was not okay with alcohol being served. Sure, it was just a brunch celebrating my upcoming wedding. I couldn’t even manage the light stuff. The sparkling pink champagne begged me to take a sip. I ran my fingertips in a circular motion across the top of the crystal glass. I caught myself and gasped at the realization I was lusting after the drink.

Raquel smacked Tabitha’s forearm. “The girl told you no alcohol, now look at her caressing it.” All my guests laughed at me as they often did. I stood up from the table, slammed my fists on the wood and grabbed the butter knife from atop a pancake. In my above the knee, red dress and heals, I walked behind them. I stopped to down each cup of bubbly that sat before the ladies. I drank so quickly, I belched. “Pardon me.” I put my hand over my mouth, covering the smell. The tip of my acrylic fingernail scratched my nose. I almost cursed.

“What do you think you’re going to accomplish with a butter knife?” asked the loud mouth of the group; Raquel. “Why did I ever consider any of you my friends?” I stumbled, catching myself on the window seal. Everything outside was now a blur. Except for Samuel; my husband to be. I could see him standing underneath the weeping willow tree. The hanging green vines covered him. I smiled, then took a moment to admire my five-carat diamond engagement ring.

The girls; angry, got up to leave. “Not so fast.”Samuel maneuvered inside as quick as lightning. He was now standing beside me. “Ladies.” He held out his hand – In a trance they took it and were escorted to a waiting chariot drawn by eight stallions. The keeper held the reins.

Samuel came back for me, whisked me down the front corridor to a Ferrari parked on the circular driveway.

“See, that wasn’t such a large price to pay to keep me here?” His eyes still glistened from the light waves of time travel. He and his brother stumbled upon a portal while fighting in the Bourbon war of Britain. The keeper of the tunnel required four futuristic women to close the gap forever and allow him to stay. After falling in love, I agreed to sacrifice my own friends. “Montrare, Moonfrare.” Drunkenly, I made up my own French words as I ripped my panty hose on the door of the sports car. You can’t find such a gentleman as he, not in this century – that was most definitely the meaning of my new saying. “Montrare, Moonfrare.” I said once more with my arms still wrapped around his neck. We all sacrifice for love.

I kept my head down and my hands in my pockets as I boarded the train, the cold was brutal against my skin.

I sat in the first maroon colored, polyester seat I came upon. The others remained empty.

The Conductor turned from his position at the door and walked briskly towards me. His tiny steps didn’t match the length of his long legs. I didn’t recognize him.

Shyly, I lifted my head and then spoke in a whisper “I don’t need a ticket to ride this train.” My Grandfather won a bet many years ago, my family traveled for free.

“I am not hear to collect a ticket, my dear.” He pulled out a deck of playing cards from his waistline and removed them from the box. He placed his thumb on top of the stack and fanned through them. One by one they fell and scattered across the floor. Suddenly, a violent wind swept through the car. All but one of the cards disappeared.

I looked towards his name tag. Scribbled on the silver plating was the inscription “Dealer”

“That card is yours.” He pointed at the single card laying unluckily on the dust covered floor. His nails long and brittle.

I glanced up at his face, there was nothing, only a void. I’d seen his type before.

He reached towards his leather boot and took from it a scroll. As he unrolled the paper, he read:“Forty years from this day, the first relative of said Gambler to board the train must retrieve an Ace from the dealer in a scatter game. This will allow them to maintain free traveling status. Winnings will be null and void for all of said Gamblers descendants should another card be picked up.” Your Grandfather signed this agreement. He held it closer to me. I suppose my families trips were becoming costly.

I got up slowly from my seat. I was nearly his same height. I looked again at his face. His eyes blue, his lips a bright red, his nose was long and pointed at the tip. I could see all of him now.

I bent down near the card I was dealt. I hovered my hand above it and then returned quickly to my upright position, leaving the card in it’s place.

“There is nothing on your scroll!” I snatched the blank sheet from his hands and tossed it on the floor next to what I knew to be the three of diamonds.

“My grandfather made a living by reading people’s faces. Did you not think I knew you were bluffing?”

I was awaken by the piercing sound of the alarm. We had been breached. Without getting up, I could see the red lights flashing and spinning through the atmosphere. My white chiffon curtains turned a mahogany from the glow.

I not only needed to follow protocol and get out to the street but I wanted to. The blare was uprooting my sanity.

I slipped on my black leather boots and overalls, grabbed my bomber jacket off the hook and ran down all twelve steps. Twelve was like a magical number around here.

I entered the crowd of residents politely saying “excuse me” as I walked straight up to Kris. “What’s going on Captain?”

“Send the ladies back inside. I only need twelve good men. Round them up and meet me in building twelve.” He instructed.

At that point I knew we must’ve had some of our transportation stolen. I enlisted Lieutenant Frost to help get the men. “Move quickly! I have already put out a SR alert.”

As a group, we marched in a single file line and entered the shelter one by one. Kris stood with his mouth gaped open in amazement. The breaker box wiring and been gnawed away, wood chips and hay were strewn all over the ground.

“What do you think has caused this Sir?” Two of the men asked in sync. He pointed up to the loft and laughed so hard, he held onto his stomach.

“Rudolph! Get down from there and bring the rest of the crew! You naughty reindeer. Your love of hay and feed almost got you electrocuted. Watch where you chew next time.” A jolly feeling came upon us all.

Kris patted me on the back and thanked us for our help. “They flew up the steps thinking they were in trouble. We all overeat sometimes.” We chuckled again, knowing that was the truth.

The crews finally repaired the dangerous section of Hwy. 9 at Warlock’s curve. The pavement uprooted causing a small bulge and cracks in the road. Every time a resident of Crafton disregarded those yellow, sharp curve signs and hit that bump, it would send them careening over the guardrails down the rugged drop off that was covered in trees – Yet they never slowed down. That spot kept our emergency workers busy.

I lived in a little wood cabin a few hundred yards from the place. When I heard action on my police scanner, I would go down there and watch.

I hoped things would get better after the mend. Well, cars stopped going over the embankment. 

But seven out of ten of them were popping a tire. The Highway Department finally came out there to investigate.

I drove down to the road to see what on earth they would find. 

“It’s this thing.” I heard Bob Marlin yell out to the rest of the guys.  “It looks like a silver ring stuck here in the road.” He made note of the pointed edges that could very well flatten a tire. 

He pulled and pulled, grunting with each motion. It just wouldn’t budge. 

He grabbed the Jack Hammer off the Big fluorescent green utility truck and dug in around that piece of shiny metal. He was shaking all over the place trying to control his tool.

Once he made a complete circle, the ground shot up into the air like a missile. I jumped behind the rusted bed of my old pickup truck and peeped around the side to see what was going on.

Gray smoke and the cackling from three horrible looking witches filled the air. Bob’s eyes remained fixated on their fingers as they waved him in, caressing his face with their long nails. One by one the entire crew disappeared. The beasts drug them down into their lair.

I realized that ring was the doorknob to hell. No one ever found out what happened to the road workers. I didn’t tell a soul what I witnessed that day. They wouldn’t believe me anyways or they would just say I was crazy because I take paxil.

“Cut! No! No! No! The dress is all off Chantel! The black and white plaid isn’t doing anything for this scene! Wouldn’t one think he needs a big winter coat? We are trying to make the viewer imagine cold, Chantel! Brrrrr… Cold!” He came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my shoulders, pulling me close as if he were warmth itself. The smell of his stale cologne gagged me. I ducked downwards to get out from under his grip. A piece of my hair got caught on his Casio watch band. “Ouch!” I said in a whisper hoping he didn’t hear me. He was one of the greatest producers in Hollywood. I knew I was lucky to work for him.

“What is this? What is this?” He stormed over to the rock wall that held up part of the bridge. All of the crew stood there puzzled, unsure of what his new problem was. He reached his hand under the first stone. “This was not supposed to be anywhere in this film!” He held up a slimy, spotted, tan colored serpent. It moved sluggishly from the cold. I shivered from fright, stuttering to find the words to tell him it wasn’t a prop. The Cast members watched in amazement, I even heard a snicker or two. The snake reared his head back and struck. I was beyond sick of Lucifer and the way he treated people. My troubles disappeared with the Cobra’s bite.

Screaming in agony, the producers eyes turned fire red, he tumbled down the ravine into the pits of hell. I was jarred back to the moment when I heard the clapperboard. . . “Yes, Sir. I will try my best to make everything perfect. I’ll do better.” I drug out my words and then curtsied as I walked off. After all, can’t a girl dream? Maybe one day, I will write my own film.

“You are a dancing machine.” I held on to my grandmother’s aged hand and moved my waist from side to side slowly with her.” She nearly broke a bone once trying to do the Twist. Chubby Checker was internationally known and a favorite at this event.

I accompanied Me-Me to the Senior Gala they held every year in Stockholm. This was our third time here.

Her smile pleased me more than anything in this world. 

Sure, we ate the finest of foods and danced to the greatest of oldies. But the real treat came just before sunset.

The servers clad in black suits and white gloves carefully carried their sterling silver trays around to each elderly person in attendance offering them a small communion cup full of a glowing pink substance that would cause them to regain their youth but for only a couple of weeks. They were beyond happy to ingest it. My grandmother slurped up the last drop to the point of trying to inhale it.

I would leave after they crowned a King and Queen of wisdom as would the others that didn’t qualify for the service. Me-Me would stay there running, jumping, dancing, playing, all the things she embraced as a young person. I let my thoughts take me away from the veranda, picturing her as a girl.

In horror, I was brought back to my surroundings by the agonizing screams of the attendees. They were dodging something that I could not see, moving as fast as their bodies would allow, some falling to the ground, lying there, appearing to play dead.

I grabbed one of the waiters by his neck and flung him up against the brick wall. I held him there lifted a bit from the ground. “What was in that? What was in that? This was not supposed to happen!” I screamed.

He shook his head “No” unable to understand my English.

“Trevor.” Me-Me used her cane to hobble closer to me. “Trevor.” She cried, tugging at my shirt tail to get my attention. If anyone had the strength to stay focused, it was my Me-Me.

“It’s the tree. He’s trying to grab us all with his arms.”

 

He wanted to buy the painting I listed for sale online. He lived locally and we agreed he could pick it up from my apartment downtown. There was always someone coming or going, I didn’t feel anxious about meeting him there.

I stuck to the idea, the higher the price tag, the larger the desire to purchase. It made people think they were getting something extravagant. He was undoubtedly one of those people.

“Five thousand dollars. It’s one of a kind, a rarity.” I had three of them, unbeknownst to him.
He felt the number was fair and thus we made a deal.

I daydreamed of a vacation and a few new duds to take on the trip. 

The door buzzer rang, I pressed the intercom and told him I would be there in a sec. I carefully toted the painting, tilting it sideways to prevent it from hitting the railing as I maneuvered down the stairs.

Once I reached the bottom, I could see him standing there through the glass door. He was a tall handsome man; his dark hair made his eyes stand out. They were as blue as the sky in the Artwork I carried. He wore a dark gray suit that fit him remarkably, black leather shoes and a tie to match.

On the road behind him sat a Camry, the driver seat broken and leaning back in a permanent horizontal position – hideous! I looked both ways down the street to see what he was driving, could be the Range Rover a block away. Surely, it was his. The two of them seemed to fit together perfectly.

“Chloe?” He asked. 

“Yes.” I held my hand out to shake his. He instead reached in his coat pocket pulling out an envelope – the cash I presumed.

He handed it to me as I prepared to give him his new asset.

“You’ve been served.” He wished me a lovely day and then drove off in his Toyota.

I ran through the forest and danced in the trees.

The smell of Toasted Acorn & Oak brought me to my knees.

Children’s laughter made all the lights beautifully glow.

I crept to the fence, looking at the town below.

One by one they knocked at the doors.

Candy in waves hitting like Dice on the shores.

How could I sneak and how could I steal?

The Scary Goodness that would be my next meal.

A Paranormal Pumpkin gave me a ride.

I sipped on Orchard Apple & Spice, to the driver I lied. 

I’m headed to town to watch the show, 

A Nightmare before Christmas, now hurry up let’s go.

I let out a cackle and covered my mouth.

I tried to hide my identity, but the secret was out. 

“Oogie Boogie” you can’t hide, I know that’s you.”

“Take this caramel apple and let that do.”

“Leave those kids alone, there’s fun to be had.”

“Your Ghostly Greetings will just make things bad.”

I cried a single tear and decided to wait. 

I’ll visit the Christmas Cottage when they open the gate.

By: Leesa Fort